So after I found out that my mind-blowingly bad news that I didn't get this job I wanted wasn't as bad as I thought, I felt a little better, but still at a cross roads of my life.
Big changes are coming. It might take a few years, but they're on the way. I can feel the wind in my hair.
Place: we are thinking of moving. No real news there, we want to move before the kids go to school. While the local Catholic school remains a real option if we do decide to stay, something about it just doesn't hit home, at least not yet. Where we are thinking of going is a work in progress. Montreal is on the list. So is Leipzig.
Just when I start to enjoy a place, make friends, I think about moving! But many of my friends will also move, and I can't plan on life being the same in 2-3 years. We can always back out if the thought of going far sounds terrible when the time comes. If we decide to stay we will move to a nearby suburb, Belmont or Newton or Arlington, or less preppy neighborhoods if we do decide on one of my top 3 private schools.
Purpose: I want to go back to school. I can't quite decide in what, but I've done some self reflecting a d come up with my two passions.
1) Nutrition. Not in the sense of helping women at Jenny Craig (although I appreciate people who do). Not in the sense of becoming a chef. I'm not a great cook to begin with, and the hours are pretty terrible. Not in the sense of farming. I love to grow things, but I'm kind of ambivalent about weeds. No, more along the lines of, I want to work with children to ensure they get a good education. I want to work with the environment to ensure healthy options that are more local and sustainable. I can imagine working with prenatal patients, or postnatal nursing, or children, or somehow being a food activist.
2) Helping people overcome obstacles. This used to make me think I should be a social worker, but I've since had concerns about how that would affect me. I think too much of me would be invested in it all, and right now my children need as much of me as they can get. Instead I've been seriously thinking about Physical Therapy. The idea started with a thought that I'd like to help veterans who have come back worse off than me. Truth is, I hope we aren't at war by the time I would fill the 7 years it would take to get there. But I like the idea of helping someone get stronger again. And this is a profession that actually earns some money.
The big thing here is, can I do these things in the places I'd like to live?
I'm just starting to explore my options. I have concerns about all options. It's been 20 years since I last took a standardized test (not including teacher certification exams, which are generally pretty basic). I could go to school in Boston, way, way, too many schools around here anyway, and then move to Germany, stay, or move to Montreal. I could take prerequisites and go to school in Montreal. cost is a huge factor. The PT program, not including prereqs, at least in Boston, would cost $106,000 over 3 years. Nutrition at Tufts would run around $70,000 for 2 years. At these costs I'd better have enough earning power to pay for the costs before our children would need to go to college!
So I'm still exploring. But I know I want to do something. My brain has gotten a bit mushy over the past few years and I'm really excited about studying again.
