Breastfeeding

I've finally come to accept the way feeding is going and have gotten into a realistic pattern.

I'd thought that I could breastfeed both twins without any problems, but I was wrong.  First there was the supply issue.  In the hospital I wasn't getting much in the way of colostrum.  The babies latched right away, although Ryan had a death grip on my nipple, but there wasn't anything there.  Not even the small amount of colostrum you would normally find. The less they found, the less they stayed on the breast trying to latch.

Which led to latching issues.  Tim would try for a minute or two, get frustrated, and begin to wail.  Ryan tried chewing his way to milk.  I'd pull him off to try for a better latch, and then he'd wail.  Two very upset babies and I was so exhausted I just went with whatever the nurses suggested.  After a day they introduced formula. 

It was a complex system.  I would have a tiny tube attached to my breast, they would attempt to nurse, and they would get formula as they suckled.  I would do one baby at a time, while Gerd would finger feed the other (ie, the tube was attached to a finger).  It worked, but was extremely frustrating getting it all to work, getting the tube in the right place, keeping it there, all while worrying that the latch was right.

We went home with this method, and were told that as my milk came in, the babies would gradually ween off of the formula.  My milk didn't come in for 6 days, the longer end of the spectrum, but still within "normal".  By then, however, the babies were used to a lot of formula.  I was supposed to pump after every feeding, because that would simulate the additional work needed to get the full amount they needed if I hadn't added formula. 

Unfortunately, pumping right after a feeding was not realistic.  There would be the diaper change, then the attempts at calming the babies from the diaper change, and the putting down for sleep, and almost all sleep occured on me.

Which means that my milk supply didn't fully come in.  Later, while working with a lactation consultant, she had me change my priorities.

I was to stop trying to breastfeed.  Formula would be mixed into bottles so the feeding would take less time and be more manageable.  I would pump religiously 8 times a day and my mother or Gerd would take care of the babies during that time.  The goal was to better establish my milk supply before it was too late.

I took herbal supplements, Blessed Thistle, Fenugreek, and eventually Golac.  I would eventually find that Golac made my nipples feel like I'd touched my tongue to the ends of a 9 volt battery. My supply inched up, and ended up around 28 ounces a day...just a little under the 30 ounces I needed for one baby.

But I was pumping every 2-3 hours and not spending enough time with the babies! It was terrible to hear them cry, but then hie off to another room to pump while someone else calmed them.  So I reduced the pumping.  I ended up pumping 6 times a day, then 5, and now 4. 

My supply has leveled off around 25 ounces.  It's enough that they get 2 or 3 bottles of breastmilk a day. They get about 6 bottles daily, now at 5 or 6 ounces, so it's not quite half their supply, but it's something.

Intermittently I would try to nurse instead of pump, but the babies were now so accustomed to bottles that they would fail to empty the breast, instead demanding a bottle.  I ended up with plugged ducts, again and again.  I've thought about trying again, now that I pump less frequently, the milk comes much faster, but then I go to long between pumpings, and end up with plugged ducts again and remember how miserable that feels.

I recently met up with the other birth mothers and babies from our Bradley Birth Class, and everyone was breastfeeding together while I pulled out a bottle.  It about broke my heart, and I vowed to try again, but it just doesn't work.  And I've come to the conclusion it's not worth more effort.  What I'm doing works.

And as a benefit, my babies get more food in during the day, so they sleep better.  Sleep is its own post, but I'll mention that Ryan slept 11 straight hours last night, and Tim slept 6 hours, then another 5 hours with only 1 bottle and a diaper change in between (30 minutes). 

I pump in the morning, around lunch, at the end of the day, and once in the middle of the night. I would love to cut out one more pumping, but my boobs don't agree, and I'm pretty sure I'd loose supply.  I'm not really sure how this will all work out on out Christmas trip to Germany, but we will have to wait and see.